Your Love Is a Deserter

Always have to give the background story:

So, I first read Matthew of Kings of Leon name dropping this band in a few interviews. I hadn't really utilized the ability of the internet to bootleg records and was too poor to go out and buy anything. They still were a name I put in the index card catalog (you know like how they use to have in the library) in my head. Where it says their band name (Kills), members (VV [real name alison], hotel [real name Jaime]) where they are from (VV from Florida originally, founding member of Discount, popular in the 90's punk scene, later moved to london where she met hotel though I am not clear where or how. Something about an apartment and mutual friends comes to mind) they played their first show on: Valentines day 2002. Bands to associate them with : Kings of Leon, White Rose Movement (due to VV dating lead singer guy), Bonnie and Clyde for their attitude. Do not compare them to: Raveonettes! They excude more sex, make better music and are just more kick ass in general. My brain has hundreds of these little index cards full of connections between bands, how many times I have seen them, what type of listener the particular band could appeal to as much as pointless information as who they may or may not have fucked, how tight they like their jeans, and their high school mascot.

First time I seen them was opening for Bloc Party. Having seen few images of them, when they passed by us and Concepcion (friend and concert goer, and yes thats her real name) said "Hey, thats the Kills right?" I was quick to respond no thats not them. They looked rushed, had tattered clothing, and the pale female whose bangs were covering most of her face definitely did not scream sexy vixen to me. However, a couple hours later when they got on stage I was shocked to learn that the Kills were in fact a hurried, messy pair of musicians whose boots would as easily stomp on your face should you offend them as stomp on your heart. Their performance was pounding in my ear, the guitar wailed, and I felt I should have smoked a cigarette after witnessing their onstage debauchery and lovemaking. Only in this case the lovemaking is strictly music and off the stage they affirm they are not involved. Which I can believe. It is a possibility. I do firmly believe that chemistry is strictly their personalities and their music and it can remain so attractive and beautiful without involving sex. Its one of those things you have to witness to believe. Or not believe.

I quickly managed to update my computer skills and acquired any of the music I could. Which was two full lengths, a couple of remixes, and a few b-sides. Its been so long I really don't know if the connection to the music was an instant one or a gradual one. I know now that they easily rank among my favorite musicians/bands to listen to. The title of this blog is proof of that.

Now:

With Valentines day approaching, and no prospects, I decided I was going to spend Valentines Day with the Kills. Well, not with them per say but in their presence. They played an intimate show as a part of Popscene, which is being held at Rickshaw Stop for a few weeks while Popscenes real home at 330 Rick gets remodeled or updated.

It sold out before I could by tickets. So I went and lined up early and met a wonderful guy who has been a fan for about four years after seeing them by chance at El Rey in LA and at SXSW later that year. I also met this girl from Bulgeria and her somewhat mute boyfriend who looked more foreign than she did. My friend Mike and I lined up and waited for a few hours in the front of the venue untill doors opened. I seen a taxi some time pull up and watched as the Kills got out of it some time after seven. I pretended to not notice them or even look at them too much for fear I may just throw up on their snakeskin boots as they passed. The guy in front of me said hi and I heard the shy and gentle voice of VV say "hello hello". This is probably the one band I could never approach to talk to and to get a photo with. Their music has so much attitude I fear they would brush me off.

Some time after doors, I headed to the bathroom, then the bar, then to the stage to ensure a prime viewing spot. I wish I could have danced as the DJ's choice songs were really good but being on the short side I had to make sure I had a spot in front.

The came out and played the setlist full of some of my favorites, as well as some new songs. I particularly enjoyed Tape Song off the new record Midnight Boom. They seemed more approachable on stage. Laughing and smiling. Even taking time to announce that it was the 6 year anniversary of their first performance ever and swigging some wine. The amps were having some trouble functioning. Which caused Hotel to jump on to the monitors and begin to kick them. Their interaction during Kissy Kissy Heart is a choreographed one but was still authentic and pure. VV picked up a guitar for a few of the songs and demanded the crowds attention with her hyperactive turns and twils on stage and angered voice wailing into the mic. Hotel with a more cunning, smoky voice did interject, though, the listener shouldn't be fooled. His voice is the type of voice that will reel you in but suffocates once its got ahold of you. Thus, is the power of the Kills. Dominant, disruptive, beautiful, standoffish, and yet inviting.

On Valentines day I had nothing but love for the Kills. A love that made a meaningless corporate holiday a reason to celebrate the union of two souls in a crowded room making noise that demands attention. I gave them my heart as they walked on stage but as is their manner it was short lived and they stomped on it and left the stage. Making me desire them all that much more.